I was recently asked two questions.  Firstly ‘How are you?’ and secondly ‘How do you know?’  I remembered checking the calendar that morning to see what appointments I had and feeling my stomach sink as I saw ‘Dentist’ written in my handwriting.  That sinking feeling communicated my anxiety to me, it was an instant reaction before any words had formed in my head.

Interoception -our super brain – body highway

Interoception is sometimes called the eighth sensory system and involves a two-way dialogue between our brain and body which takes place continually throughout the day.  Interoception is the way we know how we are feeling.

How do you know when you are feeling excited?  Do you feel a fluttering in your stomach or do you clench your muscles or feel an urge to become physically active? Where does anger show up in your body?  Do you feel a tightness in your shoulders, jaw clenching, does your breathing rate change, perhaps quicken or do you hold your breath?

Can you tell how your child is feeling from the physical sensations they describe?  Does a tummy ache coincide with a school exam, or their least favourite lesson, or do you see high energy and a flushed face when your child is bursting with excitement?

Whilst there are common physical sensations experienced by many of us related to specific feelings, our individual interoception system is shaped by our past experiences.  Someone who has experienced trauma may be highly sensitive to their inner physical sensations and these may feel overwhelming for them at times.

Equally another child may miss the physical sensations of their body, appearing distanced or detached from their emotional feelings and may even struggle to know when they are feeling hungry or cold.   If a child is not aware of how they are feeling it will be a challenge for them to manage those feelings.

Being able to notice and link physical sensations with specific feelings can be a key to becoming more self-aware and developing strategies to identify what we need to do in order to return to a state of feeling safe and comfortable again.

Ways to support your child to tune into their interoception

As adults and parents, we can support our children to strengthen their use of interoception by;

1 – Naming the physical sensations in our body we feel and the related feelings as this can highlight the link between our body and our feelings.

2 – Offer co-regulation by simply being with, alongside your child when they are experiencing a big feeling.  If your child is open to physical comfort from you, a hug, rubbing your child’s back may help them feel you are with them.

3 – When your child’s emotional state is less intense, supporting your child to name their feelings and the physical sensation which accompanied them, can gently help your child to tune into their own interoception.

4- Supporting your child to notice what activities or actions help them return to feeling safe and more comfortable again will help them become aware of strategies they can use when big feelings arise.

Playful activities can be particularly helpful as a gentle, non-threatening way for your child to reconnect with others and the outside world.  Check out Lumin&Us, our free play-based App.  The scan function is designed to help you notice what your body is telling you about what you need.  You can help your child develop their awareness of their interoceptive sense and find activities to suit their emotional needs as well as your own.

Peppy Hills is a qualified play therapist who leads Project Salam at Beacon Family Services.   

For more information about Beacon Family Service’s Project Salam, contact peppy@beaconservices.org.uk.